20.6.06

ADIESTRAMIENTO

Me despierta una luz brutal en mis ojos y una mano zarandeándome a altísimas horas de la madrugada entre los barrotes de mi celda, con los ojos pegados por las legañas consigo llegar hasta el comedor donde trago sin saborearlo un desayuno contundente

Me ayudan a embutirme en un informe traje demasiado grande para mi y me colocan unos enormes artefactos en los pies que los vuelven inútiles para cualquier cosa que no sea pisarse uno a otro

Tras un largo desplazamiento llego al centro de concentración donde otros siete compañeros me aguardan, vestidos y calzados tan lamentablemente como yo e igual de somnolientos y malhumorados a las órdenes de un adiestrador profesional.

El día se desarrolla como de costumbre entre ejercicios de escalada, derrape, caída, lucha libre, y tácticas de supervivencia, hoy he tenido suerte, sólo unos cuantos moretones y un mordisco.

En cualquier caso la dureza física del entrenamiento sólo es el menor de mis problemas, lo realmente difícil es la lucha por desenvolverme en un idioma que no puedo hablar ni leer, tan sólo he llegado a aprender lo básico para sobrevivir, no se cuánto tiempo resistiré sin poder comunicarme con nadie antes de perder la poca cordura que me queda.

Cuando llega la hora de la comida estoy tan agotado que, tras una mirada a la bazofia que pretenden hacer pasar por alimento decido que prefiero esconderme para dormir un poco, lamentablemente el adiestrador se da cuenta enseguida y me saca de mi plácido mundo obligándome a reincorporarme a la rutina, esta vez en el exterior

Luchando contra las inclemencias climatológicas logro escapar de su atención con una táctica de milicias y la complicidad de un compañero que lo distrae destruyendo el avituallamiento.
Me lanzo a la carrera campo a través, el corazón me late desesperado, llego al extremo de mis fuerzas físicas, ¿lo lograré esta vez?
Al volver la última esquina un instructor desconocido me intercepta y me devuelve al grupo donde soy gravemente amonestado y castigado con la privación de libertad, en lo que queda de tarde debo resistir atado en mi cubículo, hoy no podré volver a intentarlo.

Cuando parece que el día ya no puede empeorar recuerdo que todavía quedan las prácticas de supervivencia en medio acuático, sin ninguna protección, desnudo y vulnerable, soy arrojado al tanque de agua casi hirviente donde resbalo, me ahogo, soy engullido por la espuma y atacado con chorros a presión, cuando la tortura finaliza el agua está casi congelada, aterrorizado, hambriento, física y psicológicamente agotado no puedo evitar que unas lágrimas traidoras delaten mi vulnerabilidad.

Y mañana, se que todo volverá a empezar, aunque un rayo de esperanza cruza por mi mente justo unos segundos antes de caer agotado, mañana hace 25 meses que estoy aquí, 25 es un número redondo, perfecto, tiene que significar algo.

Si, mañana cumplo 25 meses, dos añitos y un mes que dice la adiestradora mientras me da un beso y mi muñeco. Tengo que recordar que se llama mamá.

51 comentarios:

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Si algún día tienes la ligera sospecha de que puede ver la vida así, avísame que yo lo rescato y aunque sea me lo traigo al exilio.
Con el tio exiliado, reinaría la anarquía, lo que no creo que fuera bueno para él a largo plazo, pero si hoy por hoy.
De todas formas,como con mamá con nadie aunque te sientas una adiestradora.

Anónimo dijo...

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Susy dijo...

Precioso, precioso.

Canichu, el espía del bar dijo...

ay los críos....

Anyeloso dijo...

Muy bueno. Guárdalo para cuando sea mayor. Seguro que no piensa que cualquier tiempo pasado fue mejor.

Unknown dijo...

Me ha encantado que intentases ver las cosas desde su punto de vista: dice mucho en tu favor ;-)

Un beso

marga dijo...

Aqui tengo a una pobre presidiaria descansando en el catre después de su dura jornada de adiestramiento... si lo llego a leer antes me hubiese pensado lo de mandarla a la guardería...

GENIAL!!!

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creía que era una película de schwarzenegger

Lúzbel Guerrero dijo...

Por aquí las instalaciones son al estilo, pero sin vituallas. Un estupendo y edificante relato.
No a todo (como dijera la insigne diputada)

Para, creo que voy a vomitar dijo...

:D Original cuanto menos. ¿La vida de los bebés es dura?

Pd: Qué miedo me da el de las gafas!!!

Anónimo dijo...

Pues feliz "cumplemeses". No te preocupes, aguanta, seguro que sales de tu "cautiverio" y podrás devolvérselas todas juntas, sólo has de esperar 12 ó 13 años...

Si necesitas ideas sólo has de contactar conmigo. De momento te propongo la guerra "bacteriológica".

Intercambia "bichitos" con otros compas de cautiverio, tendrás noches de "jarana" aseguradas. Lo del piercing mejor lo dejamos para más adelante...

Un besico especial para ti!

PRIMAVERITIS dijo...

Exiliado, te tomo la palabra, ¿que tal desde el viernes hasta el lunes?

Usuario anónimo, gracias, gracias

Susy, por no ser tu estilo, aún lo aprecio más que te guste.

Canichu, son una monada no? y con patatas aún mejor.

Anyeloso, ¿mayor? eso no llegará, me lo comeré a besos antes.

Bliss, en mi favor??? pero si soy majísima! y si no pregúntaselo al él.

Perlimpina, si, te lo hubieras pensado lo mismo que yo, veamos.... cinco segundos??

Gianis, es que es lo que era, tengo ya vendidos los derechos para la peli.

Luzbel, si vieras las vituallas no pensarías que es peor estar sin ellas. ¿que diputada?

Para... es durísima, y si el de las gafas te da miedo tendrías que pasarte por su blog....

Txabi, llegas tarde, la guerra bacteriológica la tiene dominada, ¿de dónde te crees que salieron las anginas?

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Perdón por el localismo, era María Teresa Sáez, quién al serle hechas varias preguntas complejas, respondió con un airoso: "no a todo".

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The organization offers one particular particular [url=http://nhommuadeal.com/thoi-trang.html]mua hang gia re[/url] for each functioning day in each and every of the marketplaces it serves. The Groupon performs as an assurance agreement utilizing ThePoint's technique: if a specific variety of individuals signal up for the offer you, then the supply turns into offered to all if the predetermined the very least is not met, no one particular will get the provide that day. This minimizes threat for suppliers, who can consider treatment of the discount codes as amount special discounts as nicely as income advertising and marketing instruments. Groupon helps make income by preserving around 50 % the money the consumer pays for the coupon.

For illustration, an $eighty massage could be obtained by the buyer for $forty through Groupon, and then Groupon and the retailer would split the $40. That is, the retailer delivers a therapeutic therapeutic massage valued at $eighty and gets around $20 from Groupon for it (under a fifty%/50% break up). Or, if $240 benefit of home portray services is attained by the buyer for $fifty by way of Groupon, then the enterprise gets $twenty five and Groupon retains $20 five. The buyer will get the therapeutic massage, or the home portray help, in these illustrations, from the retailer for which they to begin with compensated $forty (or $fifty) to Groupon. There are certain corporations to which Groupon originally did not offer you you its businesses, like capturing ranges and strip golf tools however, shooting ranges have been showcased on Groupon.

Not like categorised marketing, the services provider does not pay out out any upfront price to just take element: Groupon collects customized data from geared up customers and then contacts only folks customers, mainly by daily e mail, who may possibly almost certainly be fascinated in a specified merchandise or help.

Groupon employs a huge amount of copywriters who draft descriptions for the bargains showcased by e-mail and on the site. Groupon's marketing textual content for the 'deals' has been noticed as a contributing issue to the acceptance of the internet site, showcasing a distinctive combine of in depth reality-analyzing and witty humor.

Owing to Groupon's market turning out to be primarily composed of female consumers, the discounts are usually targeted on the nicely getting, physical fitness and attractiveness marketplaces.

There are most likely difficulties with the firm style. For case in point, a effective offer could briefly swamp a modest enterprise with as well a whole lot of consumers, jeopardizing a probability that buyers will be dissatisfied, or that there will not be satisfactory resolution to satisfy the desire from clients. Gap, a massive clothes retailer, was in a situation to manage 445,000 coupon codes in a nationwide deal (despite the fact that it experienced server problems at 1 phase), but a scaled-down sized organization could turn into all of a sudden flooded with buyers. A one espresso retailer in Portland, Oregon struggled with an enhance in buyers for three months, when it promoted near to one,000 Groupons on the 1 operating day it was supplied, in accordance to a single specific report. In response to equivalent problems, Groupon officers point out that 'deal' subscriptions ought to be capped in development to a realistic quantity.

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